the fact i talk about him so openly with all my friends is wierd. usually i hide things like this.

i go to juli for everything now. "he called me right after he got off work...is that good?" "his mom knows who i am now...is that good?" "he said he'd call me halfway through his trip tomorrow....is that good?"

i question everything...i want to just say to him "hey...where are we in this little mess of a friendship/relationship? which is it! tellll me!" everyone knows i won't though....i'll sit back being a "good girl" and let stuff happen on its own.

i'd like to think i'm just over analyzing things....but really...its just so wierd...

i'm very excited for him to call me tomorrow...its kinda of like 'yay'! only at the same time i have this cynical part of me thats going "yeah...he's only doing it because he knows you're a loser who'll sit at home waiting until he does call." i hate cynical me.

i'm going to see the italian job tomorrow. i've already booked denim...aiming for dj too...but he's kinda ticked at me for....get this....wanting to come home and sleep. jerk off.

ok...on that note i am going to bed.

i need to get up in...you guessed it...6 hours.

curses!